The Ralph Page: A New Cocktail

Thursday, May 26, 2011

A New Cocktail

FOR THOSE WHO IMBIBE IN ADULT BEVERAGES

A NEW COCKTAIL

THE BIN LADEN
2 SHOTS AND A SPLASH OF WATER

Thank you; thank you very much.
Ralph B. Strickland, Jr.
May 2011

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Dr. Darrell Pond

Dr. Pond, a minister friend of mine, has a prayer line sponsored by a Men's Bible Study Group in Chapel Hill. When you call 919/598-6464 you will hear a recorded message from Dr. Pond and he will end in a prayer. They are receiving 6 to 8,000 calls a month. There is no charge for you except the call. If you enjoy the daily message (there is a new one every day) you may call 919/596-4000 (Darrell's personal number) and ask for 10 or 20 of their business cards. You only have 45 seconds to give you name and address and # of cards you need with some speed - but clearly. He will send them to you free and you may send them to friends, or when you pay a bill put it in an envelope or as you so choose to spread THE WORD. When you run out of the cards, you only need to ask for more.

About The Author - Ralph B. Strickland, Jr.

I am a Roman Catholic, husband to the most beautiful girl in the world, Drusylla - and you should see her soul, too - and the father of two wonderful children and I like to think a father to my lovely daughter-in-law who calls me Dad. I am also a disabled veteran due to exposure to Agent Orange in Vietnam and PTSD from the trauma I suffered there.

I have taken forced retirements from the Cumberland County Sheriff’s Office, Smith Rodgers Law Enforcement Legal Consultants and Attorneys at Law PLLC [ http://www.policehelp.net ] and the Garner Police Department because Posttraumatic Stress Disorder from my 11 months and 25 days in Vietnam in 1970 have made me unemployable as an attorney. I say, “forced” because I agreed with the head of each organization that I could no longer serve them in my former capacity and at the same level of service as I was previously capable. I am just 66 years old. There you are.

I'm a Tar Heel with a BS and a JD from THE University of North Carolina without a hyphen. I wish that everyone could love his or her alma mater as much as I love mine. I was an attorney for over 35 years working almost exclusively as a government attorney for law enforcement officers - all of whom, especially in North Carolina I still consider my best friends.

My two greatest accomplishments in life I consider to be (1) convincing my wife to marry me and (2) then surviving Vietnam while my wife and three month old baby daughter waited for me to return. My wife looked exactly the same. NO! She looked better! But my daughter had grown in the 12 months and really changed. I told her I was Santa Claus and we got along right from the start.

I have always wished for a trip to the moon on gossamer wings, a Corvette with a passenger ejection seat for people I really don’t like and to slowly feed Kate Beckinsdale a whole Mars Candy Bar, tiny bit by tiny bit. {As to that last bit of fantasy my wife has said, "Bang, zoom, straight to the Moon!” See the old TV show, “The Honeymooners” with Jackie Gleason and you’ll get the joke. There will be no gossamer wings!}
For those of you familiar with military nomenclature, handle it carefully or it will blow up in your face. The EOD guys told me a half a bucket of any explosive would kill you. I carry mine around in teaspoons. MY DD-214 says I was in Vietnam 11 months and 25 days. I SAY 11 MONTHS AND 28 DAYS. Look, I can count to 362 correctly when I have 362 days to do it. A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

A New Cocktail

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